Smiegel (smee-gull)

After combing through My Documents on my laptop, I came across several pictures of Greta F. Pants.  Taken in her first few weeks of life on Earth (post womb), I am gobsmacked with how big she has gotten.  Enter: tears.  She was so cute and tiny and smooshie and soft.  Greta made little baby pteradactyl noises and LOVED to be held.  Tear, tear.  On one visit, I was able to have her sleep with me (on my chest) and it was like ingesting 5 lbs of Xanax.  Soooooo relaxing.  In fact, I think she was farting in her deep, relaxed state.  I love her mucho now, but it makes me sad that she isn't a little baby hobbit anymore.  Her little clothes were like potholders with pieces cut out.  Her little sockies were essentially 1/4s of Kleenex.

THEN.......

NOW.......

She is now 8 months old and thriving.  I'm going to start telling everyone my niece is a genius.  Just kidding.  I hate parents/grandparents/aunts/uncles like that-- I'm sorry to break the news however, babies aren't geniuses.  Perhaps when middle school rolls around and your kid can do AP Calc or say, do the New York Times Crossword puzzle with a PEN (not a pencil)..... then we can talk MENSA.

Below is a list of things I like extra lots involving Greta F. Pants:

1.)  She is a great singer.  Her voice is like a mix between Mariah and Bjork.

2.)  She farts alot and farting is always funny.  Always.

3.)  Greta's momma dresses her in sweet gear.  Most of the time, GFP's get-up doesn't match, which is awesomely creative and defining amongst her playgroup friends.

4.)  Greta's feet are as fat as they are wide as they are long..... sort of like a tuna can.  This configuration makes shoes impossible which = awesome.  Fat baby feet.  Yummy.

5.)  GFP's flowing locks are like Smiegel from Lord of the Rings.... which is ironic because Greta is from the Shire.  There are few here and few there, growing in an outward fashion.  All hairs are soft and fine and baby-soft, like a baby bird or a baby puppy.