Because Chris' mom is working on Mother's Day (a dirty shame) as well as his sister and brother-in-law, we celebrated Dia de Madre early. I planned a lovely menu, at the last minute might I add, and executed flawlessly.
I had to hit up the grocery store after work because I don't usually stock a half dozen ribeyes in my fridge on a daily basis. Strawberries, pinot grigio and bleu cheese were a few other items I needed to pick up. So, I'm cruising through Dominick's minding my own beeswax, being ever-so efficient so I can "get in, get out." I approach the check-out with hopes of getting the good checker-outer named James; James has a wonky eye and smells like gin and Sex Panther cologne BUT he can ring you up in .3 seconds flat and doesn't dick around.
Turns out that James is in fact in Aisle #1, ready to "get it on" but was (before my eyes) relieved for break as I began to put things on the conveyor belt. Dammit. In his place....... JANICE. Shit. Janice sucks at being a cashier. Aside from the fact that she has several pieces of kitty cat flair, Janice has super long gross fingernails and doesn't appear to wash her hair.
Janice is also slower than a one-legged dog in the bagging department.
Now pressed for time, I quickly unload the groceries to be scanned, swiftly move to where the bags are and start getting to work. No small talk with Janice. No time. Plus, I hate cats and the smell of garage.
After that shitshow, I had to jet home, get the potatoes in the oven for roasting and clean the house. Good thing Chris helped by doing nothing. Awesome.
Everything turned out great. Chris' mom and siblings loved dinner. Mission accomplished.
On a twisted note, I heard on the radio today that there are f-ed up people in the world that think 9/11 didn't happen. I am going to assume that said people can also be thrown into the category of "People That Think There Was No Holocaust." Were there free lobotomies given at Wal-Mart several years ago? Do these ignorant beings not read the newspaper, listen to the radio or breathe? I mean, Rush Limfuck doesn't even preach that such horrid events didn't happen.
People that claim conspiracy on world changing events need to be punched and then educated.
The Jennie Show is a daily dose of how I view the world; no sweatpant too tight, no puppy too cute and no subject off limits. 39 years of life experience has brought me my awesome husband, an unruly but very soft-earred dog, and two delicious children. I love being a mom, cooking, ready historical biographies, running, skiing, Christmas, sauvignon blanc, lawn chairs and cheesy yacht-rock-style music (most often heard in a dentist office).
Thursday, May 5, 2011
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