Let's Go Tanning

My boss told me that he went tanning.  Next topic.

Every morning I open my closet to see what appears to be the wardrobe of a kindergarten teacher.



I see in Allure Magazine, Glamour Magazine and all the other rags super awesome office clothing; shift dresses, brightly colored cardigans, accessories, etc.  Who is suppose to afford this?

  By the way, this photo is not a nod to Anne Hathaway; she annoys me.  She sucked extra hard in "Love and Other Drugs" starring his royal hotness, Jake G.  Her lipstick is always too dark and she does this weird thing with her mouth when she is trying to be seductive.  Another example of this is Drew Barrymore.

Back to my original thought-- cute office clothing.  Seriously, I grab the same style of boring SLACKS, the same style of boring cardigan/sweater and the same pair of patent leather Danskos.  I'm sure people see me in the airport and assume I'm one of three things:  a teacher, a church receptionist or a super conservative mother of 6.

Sometimes, if I'm feeling frisky, I wear hoop earrings.  Big deal.  Perhaps this cloak of boring office gear is due to a complaint I received one time from a co-worker, "Whoa.  Your hair..... is.... so..... not one color."  True story.  Just got highlights.  Really?  The person who shared this info with me had the haircut and color featured below:


"What Not To Wear" could crash my office and have at least 12 people guilty of the Cardinal Rule:
 Turtleneck and Vest combo.  A lethal dose of ugly.