I'm all things boat shoes nowadays.  I received a gift card to Macy's for Mother's Day, so I splurged the whole damn thing and purchased some Sperry Topsiders.  Pink and all things preppy, I lerv them.  Too bad the rest of my wardrobe blows.  So, this summer I will be rocking some gross clothes but sweet shoes.

We headed back to Michigan this week so Chris could complete my parent's kitchen remodel.  It looks awesome.  Not to mention, any chance to go back to the Mitten is great.

More later.

Here we go again.  I think I'm beginning to look like the fool here.  Do I buy a baby shower gift for someone who's shower I'm not invited to?  I'm continuing to try and be the better, bigger person.... though I think I look like an idiot.

What the fuck.

Beau just went down for a nap so I'm taking 20 minutes to watch TV, eat breakfast, fold laundry and make a list of things to get down today.  Featured on today's viewing docket: "True Life: I'm Too Beautiful."  Give me a fucking break.

The two young ladies featured on this episode are nothing short of ridiculous.  One is from Buffalo Grove, God help us.  Neither graduated from high school and focus ALL of their energy into thinking and putting off how beautiful they are, and how it affects their life negatively.  Seriously?  To me, there isn't anything beautiful about tons of makeup, whore clothes, the inability to communicate using proper English or having no ambition.

Beautiful to me is curiosity, confidence, self reliance, ambition, intellect.  If I ever have a daughter, I pray to God that she can be taught said things.  My parents put no emphasis on "looks" per say.  Dress appropriately, have manners, be kind, try your hardest.....  we weren't allowed to wear slutty clothes (like girls wear today) or put time into hanging out with boys.

Watch this show.  You'll laugh and cry all at the same time.

Have you ever seen a hobbitt in real life?  Go to YouTube and type in "carolinemnorton."  There are several videos of Greta Fat Pants in first year-- HILARIOUSLY porky, fat, smooshie peanutbutter chub that will brighten your darkest day.  No joke.

Beau took a few steps behind his hoopty car thingy this morning.  Dear Lord.

Until the walking fully commences, we will be fine with him pulling up on furniture to bother Kasia.  

Note to self:  Do not make Gooey Butter cake when trying to exercise self control.  I've done very well eating more balanced and moving more.  A small piece of GBC never hurt anyone, right?  Shit that shits good.

My dream of wanting to have 5 kids is slowly going away.  Some days, I have an awesome day and think "this isn't so bad.  I could totally raise 4 more."  Other days I just want to down 4-7 bottles of Pinot Grigio, lay in bed and watch reruns of RHONJ.  Beau is easy.  Really.....  he rarely cries and naps twice a day.  Sometimes, he has an off day or doesn't want to make "good poopies."  Sorry, I know... gross.  Get over it.

I'm really blessed.  I know people say adding more kids to the stew is harder; even less time for yourself, expensive, etc.  When I close my eyes, I daydream about having a house full of teenage/young adult boys.  It makes me happy.  Envision Susan Sarandon's character from "Safe Passage."  Thats me.  We'll see what happens.  I'm not getting any younger and know for sure I want more kids.  One more?  Four more?  Please God give me multiples, then I can hang it up.

On a funny note, I went running with Beau (in the jogging stroller) and Grace-Anne/Kasia-Janice.  What a joke.  Kasia practically ripped my arm off trying to run after many a rabbit.  Holy shit.  "Leave it" is like speaking to Kasia in Yiddish.

Beau's beauhawk hath disappeared.  Something happened when we were in Michigan.  I don't know if its the humidity, the general state of the union or what.  Breaks my heart.  Come back unicorn whispies of soft magic.  We miss you.

I've been on hiatus for like, 2 weeks.  I'm home.  Thank God I'm home.  Chris, Beau, Grace-Anne (Kasia) and I headed to the Hills of Bloomfield for a little vacay.  Well....err..... Chris started demo on my parent's kitchen, so Shep, Kasia and I tagged along so Chris wouldn't have to go 2 weeks without seeing us.  A few observations:

1.)  Having a 9-month-old in a construction zone sucks.  Dust, drywall..... no me gusta.

2.)  A working stove and washer/dryer make a world of difference or a world of hurt if they aren't hooked up.

3.)  Bloomfield Hills is and will always be home to me.

4.)  There is a far greater selection of ethnic foods where my parents live than where I live, which blows.

5.)  Though the series is tied, I couldn't be happier that the Wings are playing the Blackhawks.

6.)  I was introduced to Friday Night Lights (tv show) and I'm obsessed like a heroin addict.  Lerv.

While on hiatus, Beau learned to officially crawl (not Army crawl), cut one of his front teeth (making it 7 teeth in his grill) and now pulls up on furniture.  His beauhawk is still flowy, wispy and magical and his skin is still magically softies.

Now that I'm back home in Chicago, I'd like to gripe about how lame our streaming internet is.  It fucking sucks.  Comcast blows and can kiss my ass.  I can't watch Netflix without a show being interrupted by the "streaming" indicator.  Blows.

The house was being looked after by neighbors.  Thank God for them.  Our grass was cut in the front, but it looks like a rainforest out back.  HOWEVER, my flowers have bloomed.  Gorgeous.  Love.

I feel so blessed to have awesome people in my life.  Great family and friends.... the true meaning of "ohana."  Look it up if you don't know the definition.

Chez Mofo was graced with some throwback presence in the form of MPG.  With her ducklings in tow, MPG and I had plenty of time on the patio to reminisce, drink some beers and enjoy the splendor that Michigan in May has to offer.  I wish I lived closer to MPG-- I truly enjoy her company (as well as her kids) and sharing a few laughs.

Speaking of Chez Mofo, the kitchen demo is well under way.  Its sucks being in a construction zone with a 9 month old (that loves to crawl).  We've harbored ourselves in the basement mostly, which is ridden with toys and things to pull up on.  Beau couldn't be happier.  Additionally, my parents (Mimi and Pepe) are lerving all things Shep..... his hair and the full regalia of baby softies all day long.

I've missed most of my shows this week-- so no one tell what happened on Mad Men last Sunday.  I did however, what this week's RHOOC.  Vicki's face has certainly shown better times-- she is passed the point of no return when it comes to facial plastic surgery.... hence why you have to be so careful with cosmetic upgrades.  Stick to Botox and sunscreen, and leave out the nipping and tucking.

The 20/20 episode last night talked about the Jodi Arias verdict and the horseshit Arial Castro debacle

in Cleveland, OH.  Unbelievable.  First things first:

Jodi Arias is a fucking nut job.  Though the murder happened 5 years ago, the verdict was released this week.  This chic was fishy from day one.  If you didn't do it, than don't change your story 76 times and claim you're innocent.  I've said before I don't believe in the death penalty (only God can determine who lives and who dies) but I that may be her sentence.  I hope Jodi Arias can come to terms with the jury's decision.

Arial Castro.  An even bigger nut job.  Holy crap.  Nothing like holding 3 women hostage, abusing them, IMPREGNATING them..... I'm sure he did countless other things to them that the public will never know.  How does one recover from such a horrific set of events?  A child was born in that hellhole....  Please Lord in Heaven make her understand that just because a monster is her dad, it doesn't mean she is tainted.

All being said, I think the US needs to offer FREE psychiatric screenings, counseling and medication.  Obviously we are in a world of hurt when it comes to the mental health of our country.  Cancer, AIDS, ALS, MS, Alzheimer's.....  mental illness is just as destructive.  Forget about the gun control horseshit for four seconds.. and while I'm on that topic..... banning guns won't stop people from having guns.  Just like drugs or any other banned item, people will find a way to get them.

My son is a mini version of his father.  Notice the little red mark by his right eye?  Yeah.  A chair did that.  Right in front of me.  Also, please take note of the magical blonde whispy unicorn softie that is ever-so-slightly growing over his left (and right) ear(s).  Sometimes, after an intense nap, those softies curl upwards.  Magic.  No need for heroin-- just touch Beau's hair.

Roses and Thorns

Roses:

1.)  I went to Menards, Home Depot and the Clover Nursery (seasonal) flower basket hunting.  As gorgeous as the flowers are at Clover's, the prices are WAY TOO HIGH.  I've have concluded that Home Depot is the best bang for your buck when it comes to sprucing up the yard.  They had a great assortment of annuals and perennials.  I WILL be back there soon to buy beauties for the backyard.  (the front yard is on hold until we decide if we're getting a new walkway)  The side yard(s) are going to have to wait.

2.)  Beau has really impressed me with the sleep schedule.  Though it stinks being home many hours of the day, he needs his sleep.  Two naps during the day and bedtime between 6-7 is keeping the little one delightful.  Plus, when he wakes up from naps Shep is SUPER softies and cute.

3.)  Dad is coming to visit today.  Yes.  Some Mofo Ohana time.  

4.)  Mom and Dad's kitchen renovation starts Monday.  I can't be happier.  So, if you have a blowtorch in the greater Bloomfield area, feel free to bring it over next week.  They will be leaving 1985 and stepping into 2013.  Kicking ass and taking names.  No more foul cabinets and linoleum floors.  Good riddance.  Homeowners-- don't EVER put in linoleum....EVER.  It never looks good.  EVER.

5.)  Pinterest.  

Thorns:

1.)  I'm in a food rut.  Perhaps I should take my own advice and look on Pinterest for dinner ideas.  

2.)  There is a black lab named Jackson that cruises the neighborhood.  Sometimes he is nice, sometimes not.  This morning he was nice-- thank Jesus on the cross.  He ran up to Kasia, Beau and I while on our daily walk and scared the shit out of me.  If that dog mauled Shep or Kasia, I would've gone Detroit on him..... dog loving or not.  Don't mess with my ohana.  And secondly, the owner of the dog is a hot stinkin' mess.

Wal-Mart didn't have anything in terms of perennials.  Scratch that off the list.  I guess it'll be Home Depot for my flowers splurge.

Beau has been sleeping in just a onesie lately and I want to eat him.  I look at his monitor occasionally (after putting him down for bed) and sometimes, I catch him sleeping with his little delicious fanny in the air.  So cute.  Edible smooshiness.

OK.  I'm done stalling.  Did anyone see the Teen Mom Check-Up last night on MTV.  Holy shit.  Jenelle is a train wreck.  Apparently, she learned another useful life skill from Keifer, her loser boyfriend (now ex, since she is married and trying to divorce her spouse)..... heroin.  Awesome.  When I'm laying around the house bored.....which never happens......  I fold laundry, clean, catch up on DVR'd shows.  Jenelle, apparently, shoots up heroin.  Brilliant.  I pray that she gets her life together for the sake of her son.  No kid needs a junkie mom.

I watched "Safe Haven' starring Julianne Hough and Josh Duhamel.  One of my guilty pleasures is Nicholas Sparks' type flicks.  Lerv.  My other guilty pleasures are listed below:

Diet Coke

crap TV such as RHOOC, Teen Mom and Millionaire Matchmaker

sweatpants

the Ambrosia channel on Pandora

sushi and Arabic/Mediterranean food

Julianne Hough has the cutest hair cut in the movie and Josh.....well Josh is delicious.  I think its weird he is married to Fergie in real life.  I wonder what they talk about at night?

Maybe I should've been an investigator.  I'm obsessed with all those real life crime shows:  20/20, I Evil, Dateline on ID.... anything on the ID network.  Obsessed.  Most episodes, I solve the crime and know who did it.  Weird.  Because, crime solving requires patience which I don't have.  Cripe.  I get annoyed changing Beau's diaper when he doesn't stop squirming.

Speaking of which-- our sleeping schedule is hard to stick to.  I feel like I'm stuck at home just to keep with the plan.  Oh well.  A well rested baby = a happy baby.

I'm chomping at the bit to get flowers planted.  I'm waiting til Mother's Day.  A good rule of thumb.  Also, I'd like to look at Walmart's selection of clearance items.  Its a perennial-only year at the Willis'.